Everyone messes up. I make a mistake or mess-up with Carter on a weekly if not daily basis. My most recent mess-up was clipping his nails. We were getting ready to leave for the day and I noticed his fingernails were really long. I hate it when he claws himself during the day so I decided to clip his nails.
Mind you I have only clipped Carter’s nails once before. I accidentally clipped one nail too short, Carter cried, and I decided I wouldn’t clip them again. I either filed his nails or had Ty clip them. I knew I didn’t have time to file his nails, so I decided to very carefully clip them.
He was in the jumparoo so I had easy access to his hands. I grabbed the first hand and started clipping. When I got to the second hand I was so relieved and thought in my head, thank goodness I haven’t nicked him yet. I got to his thumb on his right hand, the last finger to clip. That’s when it happened.
I clipped the nail and felt very successful, I did it, I’m done! I looked at Carter’s face and it was bright red and his lips were drawn down into a frown. He began to wail and that’s when I saw blood bead up and roll along the tip of his finger. I panicked, did my best to not cry along with him, grabbed him out of the jumparoo and immediately popped his thumb into my mouth and sucked it. Why? I have no idea. I guess I thought it would help with the pain? Doesn’t make much sense thinking back on it, but I was desperate.
|My poor baby's thumb.|
What happened next? My momma worry kicked in. By the time I got to daycare the next day I was convinced it was infected. Welcome to the life of a mom, trying to do the right thing, messing up, and then endlessly worrying about it! It’s been almost a week and it’s healed up just fine. No infection at all. Now the guilt I feel for hurting my baby? Yeah, it’s still stickin around.
|He was all smiles moments later, but I was not!|