Funny Stuff the Kids Say

Elise: You don't want to be outside bleeding.
Me: Oh, yeah?
Elise: Yeah, you'll get followed by those dang squirrels!

"Mommy, if I laugh too hard, I pee my pants. Even if I don't have to go one bit." -Elise

"I think someone sent a message." -Elise during her class Zoom Meeting, I checked the chat box and she was the one who sent the message. I guess she just felt like tattling on herself!

Conversation during the lead-up to Elise's music lesson: How can you change the world?

Elise: Only eating healthy food and also mac and cheese sometimes. No treats at all.

Me: Carter why is your video turned off: Please turn it back on. (During his Zoom class)

Carter: But I don't want to get called on! 

Elise: I can't sleep because I'm too happy. I can't sleep because I'm too happy for Christmas. It's not that long away.

Elise: Mommy, anyway I just love your face.

Me: I just love your face.

Elise: Your face is just so gorgeous.

Elise: Do you know why I don't want a snake?

Me: Why?

Elise: Mites

Me: Mites?

Elise: Yeah, they can get mites and usually it's under their chin so you have to lift their head up to check. You have to check their whole bodies. Mites can make snakes sick and die.

"You have a lot of stuff in your head. You need to let it rest!" -Elise

Me: Did someone get out of the bath and run down the hallway?

The kids: No

Me thinking: This makes no sense, the hallway carpet is so wet.

Me: Okay, did someone get out of the bath and walk down the hallway?

The kids: Yes

We were at the zoo and one of the animals was off exhibit.

"Ah, this one's out of stock!"-Elise