A Letter to Elise at 8 Months

It blows my mind you are already 8 months old! Everyone says time goes by faster with the second child and it's so true! With your brother I felt like I was waiting for him to hit certain milestones and with you all the sudden you're doing it and I find myself thinking, "She's doing this already?!?" Then I realize how old you are and think, "Well, yeah, that's about right." This month has been straight awesome. You can play more with your brother and downright belly laugh at him. Your morning nap has shortened to 45 minutes to an hour and a half most days with some days at 2 hours. That makes it easier to get out and about. Your afternoon nap overlaps with your brother's for about 30 minutes to an hour. That gives me time to get a few chores done and then I have glorious one-on-one time with you. I really enjoy getting out the sensory bins, reading books, and watching you move around. It is so much fun to have that little snippet of time to focus on only you and boy do you have a sweet smile! I also enjoy going to storytime because I get to have you in my lap while Carter sits with the other kids. You actually pay close attention to the book and love watching the kids around you. Sometimes Carter wants to sit on my lap with you and it warms my heart to have both of my babies snuggling with me!

Something awesome about you is that you do really well playing by yourself. I can lay you down on the carpet and you will play with toys and roll around completely content. Your favorite toys are cars or anything with wheels and balls. You love to spin things and roll them. You will roll across the room to get to a car. You have also been known to roll over and pull books off the book shelf. When we read you grab at the pages and try to turn them. My phone is something else you roll for and try to grab. I'm not sure why you love it so much! Another favorite is our sensory bins. You could sit and play with them for hours. Unfortunately you still shove things in your mouth so I only let you play with them if I'm sitting right next to you. That means you typically play with them for 30 minutes to an hour at a time. Just this month you started crying for me to pick you up sometimes. There have been a few times when I lay you down to play and you cry until I pick you up. You are perfectly content being carried around or sitting in my lap in those situations, it doesn't matter as long as you are touching me.

I'd say the biggest development this month has been your ability to sit unsupported. I still sit with one leg behind you so you won't hit your head if you fall and if I have to walk away I put your Boppy around you just in case most of the time. Just this past week I left you sitting by yourself for at least 15 minutes and you never toppled over! You can even bend all the way forward and then sit back up! You are a strong girl! When you first started sitting you also started waking up during Carter's naptime. One day you were playing with a toy of his and I took a video of you. When he saw the video I was afraid he might be jealous you were awake and playing with his toy but his response was, "Sissy's sitting all by herself!!!" He was so excited and it was the sweetest! Since you are able to sit so well you had your first ride in the wagon. It was the weekend of Halloween and Carter had a blast pulling you up and down the driveway as you sat and played with a teething purse our neighbors gave you in a Halloween goody bag. You have also been getting up on all fours and rocking for a while. It started in your crib at night. You'd fall asleep for about 45 minutes and then wake up and cry. When I'd go in to check on you, you'd be up on all fours rocking. The first time you did it during the day was at the library while we were playing before Storytime on November 3rd. Since then you've been doing it more and more. You've even moved one knee forward in an attempt to crawl but fell forward onto your belly. I predicted you will be crawling by 9 months but we'll see, I could be totally wrong. This is new territory for us as your brother never did any of the practice stuff they say kids do before crawling. At 11 months he went from rolling everywhere to crawling one day out of the blue!

One of my favorite new developments is your babbling. You say "lalalala" a lot! You've also said mama and babble "mamamama" frequently. The first time you said it was on November 4th and I was so excited! Carter will say, "Sissy say mama!" and it's amazing that a lot of the time you do and clear as day! Thanks to him you say mama a lot. You said dada for the first time November 20th. You like to blow bubbles with your mouth. You also like to stick out your tongue to blow raspberries and think it is so funny! Going along with that you like to play with your tongue. You roll it and turn it upside down. It is frequently in the corner of your mouth rolled in some way. You really are just so funny! You started giving kisses too. Open mouthed, slobbery, almost eating my cheek kisses. If I give you a kiss you turn, grab my face, and return the favor. I love it so much!!! Just these last couple days you've started waving back when people wave at you. Talk about cute!

You still love Carter and Harper so much. Whenever you see either of them you light up and even giggle. You track them as they walk and you even laugh when Harper licks you, ew! The other day when daddy got home from work you were playing on the floor and looked up in time to see his reflection in the glass of the door in front of you. You broke out into a giant smile and started kicking your legs. It was the absolute sweetest! I love seeing you play with Carter. You love the ball pit and play in there a lot. When Carter's in it with you, you laugh pretty much the entire time. It's the cutest! Carter loves you so much. When we're out somewhere and kids are pointing you out and saying you're cute, he'll tell them, "That's my baby. Her name is Elise." Some days the timing works out to where you can bathe with Carter and you really enjoy it! He tells you to pretend to be certain animals, like a frog, and gives you props such as a green wash cloth on your forehead. It's precious! Usually daddy gives you a quick bath while Carter and I finish up dinner. Carter eats slower and I'm always behind because I feed you as I eat. The sweetest is walking in and seeing your daddy brushing your hair. It gets me every time! You have these light blue jammies with flowers on them that your daddy loves and he puts them on you whenever they are clean even though they have snaps and he hates jammies with snaps!

You enjoyed your first Halloween this month. Daddy made the stroller into a pirate ship and you got to dress as a mermaid. Oma crocheted you a hat with long blonde hair, a seashell bra, and a mermaid tail. It was adorable! You won costume contests at 2 different 5k races with daddy. Then when it came to trick or treating I wore you in the carrier and you napped for a lot of it. We are already planning out your costume for next year and are quite excited! 

For the Run to the Lights race, daddy stayed at the hotel with you and Carter and put you both to bed on his own. You had your first bottle in a long time and took it like a champ. Daddy said you held it and fed yourself while he took care of Carter. When he went to take the bottle, you had mangled the nipple chewing on it. Before then you bit me a few times while nursing, but now do it more frequently. When it seems like you are about done nursing I cut you off because when you get full you start biting me, ouch! Right now you nurse every 3-5 hours during the day and go 8-12 hours most nights. We have only been feeding you solids/purées at dinner time. We started feeding you another meal this week. So far it has been lunch. You've tried quite a few foods for the first time this month. You had puréed peas on October 28th. On November 2nd I gave you green beans sliced in half long ways and you rocked it feeding yourself! November 9th I gave you small mango chunks which you loved but struggled to feed yourself since they were kind of slimy. Puréed pumpkin was introduced November 15th and then we gave you ground turkey on November 17th totally breaking the 3-4 day wait between introducing new foods. You absolutely loved the turkey and I think part of that was because you were able to feed yourself really well. You also enjoyed that Carter fed some to you in between sneaking bites of your food. On November 20th we went to a program at the art museum. They had snacks out for the kids and one snack available was puffs. I got you some and you ate them like a champ! I'm thinking it's about time to start giving you a little water in a sippy cup. You love water and still try to drink it in the bath constantly. I have a story that will probably kill you of embarrassment when you are older. One day you were rolling on the rug while I cooked dinner. You rolled off the rug and started playing with Carter's socks he had taken off earlier in the day. Then I noticed you were moving your head strangely and went over to find you were sucking water out of his dirty socks! He took them off because he got them wet in the backyard.

Elise you are the sweetest little baby and we just love you so much! I am so thankful every day that you came into our lives. You have a sense of humor, are good natured, love to smile, and give me kisses! What more could I ask for! I love you so much, little girl!

Now on to Daddy:

You are still all eyes for you brother! You are always looking for him and when you hear his voice, you whip your head around to find him. He has also just recently started coaching you to say momma and dadda. I think that you will be speaking a lot sooner with his help!

You are such a bouncy little thing these days! We were facetiming with your Gma and Gpa the other night, and you got so excited and bouncy that it was getting difficult to hang onto you!

You are also very vocal, just babbling away whether anyone is listening or not. It is so much fun to hear that, especially if you do it when you first wake up and are happily babbling in your crib.

A Letter to Elise at 7 Months

This post is going up super late because we were having technical difficulties with our nice camera. Finally this weekend Ty was able to snap some pictures of our sweet girl using our fancy camera. I think the pictures were worth the wait!

My sweet Elise, you are such a good little girl. You are so happy, so full of joy, so ready to smile at any given moment. You've been laughing for a while but just this past week started laughing more frequently. Before it was so hard to get you to laugh and we really had to work for it! Now you hear me laughing and laugh in response without even knowing what we're laughing about. I love that about you and I love how you smile with your mouth open and now have 2 little jagged baby teeth showing through that bottom gum! You are just so darn cute. I also enjoy that you are a momma's girl and whip to attention when I enter the room and even reach for me. I'm sure that won't last long but it's fun right now. It's so enjoyable how babies constantly show their love. That's one thing I really enjoy about babies! You have also started to show interest in other babies and reach for as well as talk to your buddy Addison. She is slowly catching up to you in size and now weighs more than you although you are still a little taller.

We have seen an increase in your mobility and you roll like a champ, all over the place. You even try to roll over in the bathtub! I love watching you do it because it reminds me so much of your brother! You can also sit for really long periods of time without falling and without support! You have also learned to lean forward to put your hands on the ground as support. You push up on your arms and are starting to work on getting your knees under you. There have been a couple times that you have army crawled to get something just a couple pushes. You are like your brother in that aspect as well. If you are trying to get something and can't quite get to it you just pick something else to play with. The only things you work really hard to get are my phone, Carter and his hair specifically, and Harper also for her hair.

One thing about you that really cracks me up is that you lick stuff. Rather than stick things in your mouth like most babies, you lick things. Most of the time you then stick it in your mouth but you almost always lick it first! You also like to drink water. You turn your head and drink out of the bathtub. You also like to grab my water bottle and drink out of the straw. Daddy has even given you a few drinks from a cup.

You are always grabbing stuff and I have been super impressed with your pincer grasp. You can pick up food really well, you just aren't super successful at getting it in your mouth. You do love food though. We were going the baby led weaning route but you weren't getting much in your mouth and I do want to go ahead and introduce foods so once you are able to feed yourself we have more choices for what you can eat. Some foods you had for the first time this month were pear on October 4th and butternut squash which I puréed for you on October 21st. You have food once a day with us at dinner time. The weekend of the Prairie Fire half marathon you ate an entire banana smashed up with Oma while I was running. It reminded me how nice it is for you to be eating foods so I don't have to worry too much about being gone too long or pumping enough milk. Eating will be getting easier as you now have 2 teeth! Your first tooth popped through on October 18th and your second came shortly after. You now have both of your bottom middle teeth.

Sleeping has been huge this month. You have gone 12-13 hour stretches quite a bit. We always get at least 7 solid hours out of you. That means I sometimes feed you once per night and others not at all. When you sleep all night you wake up super hungry and cluster feed in the morning. If you wake up to eat during the night you wake up happy in the morning but if you don't wake during the night, you scream when you see me. Sometimes it's like you forget you are hungry and then you see me and panic over your starvation. Your first 12 hour stretch came right after your 6 month birthday on September 25th. I was a little worried you were dead but didn't panic like I did with Carter the first time he slept through the night.

You are getting so big! You wear 6 month and 9 month clothes across the board. You are pretty long with the length of your pants and the length of your sleeves causing you to need 9 month clothes in some brands. At your 6 month well check which was really at 6.5 months you weighed in at 15.4 pounds which put you in the 27th percentile and you measured 26.5 inches putting you in the 66th percentile. Your head was 17.2 inches for 78th percentile. Just like your brother you are longer than you are heavy and your head continues to jump up quite a few percentiles each time we go! You are such a big girl!

My favorite thing about this month is how vocal you have become. You seem so close to your first words and I am so looking forward to it! You love to mimick right now and will copy coughes, facial expressions, snorting, and other noises. Your favorite thing to do is blow air through your mouth with your tongue out to make noises. Carter calls them your "elphalant noises" and finds them hilarious! He will report to me when you are doing them and tell me how funny you are. You still think he is the best and love watching him. You smile at him and even laugh sometimes and he just loves it. He'll even say, "Sissy look!" He also asks me to show you things and makes sure I follow through. Anytime he walks by you he stops to give you a kiss. It's the sweetest!

I love you so much, sister girl! You are such a sweet baby and bring me so much joy. I look forward to each day I get to spend with you and really try to slow down and enjoy the little moments when I can.

Now on to daddy:

So close to being a little girl on the move! You want to be mobile, and in a few weeks or months, I am sure you will be. That will be so much fun. I think that your brother will be the most excited!

You have been experiencing so many new foods it has been very exciting during dinner time. You are such a fast little eater it's hard to do anything other than feed you! Soon you will be feeding yourself with us at the table.

Something you do a ton is blow spit bubbles. Cracks me up and you love to do it! Growing up so fast baby girl and I can't wait for the next month!

Sister Has Teeth!

When Carter was 5 months old or so we kept thinking he was getting close to teething because he was drooling pretty much nonstop. I was daily checking his gums just so sure teeth were on the way. Then when he was 6 months old he went through a rough patch of sleep where we could only get him to sleep if he was on either Ty or my chest. Then voila, his bottom 2 teeth popped out around 7 months and sleep went back to normal. I've heard stories of kids who just all the sudden pop teeth and their parents had no idea because they didn't act any differently. Definitely not my kids! Teething isn't horrible and it has been much easier this time around because we knew what was going on, but it isn't easy. Little miss has been drooling for quite a while, probably about the same amount of time Carter was. Then she started in with only sleeping on my chest at night and I knew teeth were coming. She did the exact same thing Carter did although there was much less screaming this time. Poor Carter being the first child, we didn't know what was wrong and couldn't find anything that should be causing the crying so we had him cry it out for a few nights before chest sleeping and then the teeth eventually coming. Since Elise was acting the exact same way Carter had, I just popped her on my chest at night and although she tossed and turned quite a bit, she slept. There wasn't crying and it was all pretty stress-free.

Every night since she started struggling with sleep I'd check her gums before laying her down for bed. Nothing. Saturday night I checked her gums and still nothing. Then Sunday we went to a pumpkin patch close to my parents' house. Ty was holding Elise and put his finger in her mouth announcing she had a tooth. I couldn't believe it. Not there at night, there the next afternoon! I'm not sure why but I get so stinkin excited for that first tooth and so proud. It's not like they do anything to get there other than endure pain. I tried to take pictures but sis wasn't having it. She stuck her tongue out every time I tried. I was so excited about it I guess it rubbed off on Carter. Yesterday at the zoo he was sitting on the front of the single stroller while Elise was strapped in and she suddenly started scream crying. I asked Carter what had happened and he said, "I was just looking at her tooth. See?" and then proceeded to pull her bottom lip out very roughly.

Last night Elise was running a low-grade 99.5 degree temperature so we dosed her up with Tylenol. She woke up with her second tooth popping through right next to the first and still a low-grade temperature. When I took her temp and saw it was again 99.5 I was reminded of the struggle we went through with Carter at daycare. They used under arm thermometers so they added a degree to his temperature when they took it. If he was running a little 99.5 degree temp due to teething that bumped it up to 100.5 and their policy was a child got sent home if their temp was 100.4 or over. Obviously I wanted to be home with Carter every chance I got, but with a limited number of sick days and having to create sub plans it was so irritating to get a call to pick him up only to take him home and find his temperature was barely over 99 degrees. There were times I had thought his temperature was due to teething and I got a call saying it was over 100 degrees and I'd freak out thinking he must be sick on top of teething, but no his temp really was just 99. I'm so glad I don't have to deal with that anymore! I'm also so glad that on days like today when Elise isn't feeling up to par because of teething she can sleep in until 8:00 and take a 2 hour morning nap. I had to wake Carter by 7:00 at the latest to get him to daycare and make it to work on time and he never napped well at daycare. There are so many times I am reminded what a gift it is to be home with my babies and today was a huge one for me!

Taking Our Babies On A Walk

This morning Carter was really enjoying his baby doll. He plays with her from time to time. My favorite thing he does is put on my Garmin running watch and grab the stroller telling me he's going for a run as he takes off through the house. This morning he was all about his baby. He put her in her stroller and was walking all over the house. Then he told me he was taking her to the park and I asked him if he wanted to take his baby on a walk to the park by our house while I walked sissy in her stroller. He was so excited he immediately ran into his room to get dressed. Normally getting dressed is a bit of an ordeal. When he came back out I stifled a giggle. I figure you have a 50/50 chance of getting your clothes on the correct way as long as your body parts are in all the right holes. He had managed to put not only his shirt but also his shorts on backward as well as his shoes on the wrong feet. I looked at him and instead of saying anything about his clothing, just said, "Okay, daddy, are you ready to go?" To which he responded with a huge grin and a giggle. I could tell he felt like such a big boy! He told me he needed to get a mimi (banana) snack for his baby to have at the park. He also asked to take Harper with us and informed me he had one hand to push the stroller and the other to hold Harper's leash. Thankfully it didn't take him long to realize he needed both hands in order to push his stroller because I wasn't giving him the leash!

Notice his crooked shorts.

Watching him walk to the park pushing the stroller was the absolute cutest! He was so careful to walk right up next to the curb to keep his baby safe. He even wanted to walk up in the grass but realized how hard it was to push the stroller through the grass. Maybe now he'll understand what I mean when I explain that I slow down in the grass because it is harder to push the stroller. When we got to a curb he very carefully lifted the front wheels up and onto the sidewalk and then the back wheels, just like he sees me do! Sometimes I need those reminders that he is always, always, always watching and listening to what we say and do will pick things up, good or bad, without us even meaning for him to!

Here you can see his backward shirt.

When we got to the park he informed me his baby had a dirty diaper and got to work changing it as I laid out a blanket and put Elise down to play on it. He was so sweet and gentle changing his baby's diaper and putting her in clean clothes because "she got poop on yem." Then he laid his baby down next to Elise and took off to play, only to return moments later to take his baby to play with him. My heart melted as he sat in the wood chips with his baby in his lap, handing her wood chips and pretend playing with her. Then I watched as he carried her up the ladder and was very upset he accidentally dropped her. After he dropped her the rough and tumble came out as he put her down the slide and then went down behind her, knocking her off the end. Although he did stop to wipe the wood chips off her bottom.

Taking her clothes off to change her diaper.

Taking his baby to go play on the playground.

Once he'd played with her on the playground for a while he brought her back over and said he wanted our babies to play. I had the doll play peek-a-boo which he loved! When our timer went off saying it was time to go, Carter rushed over and very gently put his baby in her stroller, taking off down the sidewalk. It was such a fun, little morning outing and I was so proud of how sweet Carter was with his baby. I could tell he was proud and felt like such a big boy too. Every person or car that passed, he stopped and waved with a huge smile on his face! He is such a sweet brother and he will make a great daddy some day.

Facilitating baby play time.

6 Months Postpartum

This has been my breakthrough month. The month where everything has started to come together. All my postpartum training that has been blah and then so-so and okay and better is now picking up speed. I feel like the effort I'm putting into runs finally matches the pace I'm running, without the double stroller. With the double stroller I'm still working so much harder than what paces indicate but that will always be the case, that thing is a beast! My weight loss is also more in line with how I'm exercising and eating as the pounds are now falling off week by week. I'm now a mere 2 pounds from my pre-pregnancy weight! Sleep has been pretty awesome with Elise going at least a 7 hour stretch at night with a PR just shy of 12 hours!

My sweet, little running buddies!

With running I'm feeling great and cruising to some times and paces that make me so happy! My training is finally coming together and I'm recovering so much quicker from hard efforts. I'm now able to put just 2 days between hard efforts so I can easily get 2 hard workouts in per week. I've been doing speed work again and have had no bleeding so I'd say I'm finally healed from childbirth! One week I'll do speed work and a tempo, the next I'll do speed work and a long run. I've only been back to speed work for a week, but that's the plan at least. Up until I added speed work back in I was doing a tempo run and then a long run per week. But only doing long runs every other week. I think part of the reason for quicker recovery is that my body is healed and another part of the reason is that my Fitbit has encouraged me to be more active on recovery days. Now I walk more the day after a long run or other hard workout which allows my legs to stretch out and loosen up.

What runs look like these days.

I've built my long run up to 12 miles and have come to love the long run. It's typically either the only run or one of 2 runs during the week I do without the stroller. I find myself looking forward to that all week. I revel in the ease that is running without that beast. I enjoy the quiet and calm that comes with running along uninhibited by a fussing toddler or crying baby. It's just me, the pavement, and the sweet feeling of pushing my body. Don't get me wrong, I love running with the kids. It is so much fun to look down and see Carter holding Elise's foot or Elise playing with her toys. I get so excited when we see trains, construction equipment, or animals on our run. When I'm out by myself I catch myself wishing Carter was with me so he could see something cool I ran across. That being said, there's just something about running with no company other than your thoughts. It's freeing and meditative. I've had a string of really strong long runs that have gotten me excited to see what I can do in a half marathon. It started with my first 12 miler that I ran at 8:40 pace. Then I ran 8 miles at 7:53 pace. Then the day before Elise turned 6 months old I ran another 12 miler, this time at 8:01 pace! An awesome pace and a great mental boost as it was my last long run before our October 11th half marathon. After Carter was born my last 12 mile run before my 1:38 half was at 7:55 pace, so I'm not far off! To shed light on how much I've improved the last few months, the last 3 miles of that 12 mile run was at the pace I ran for a 5k just 2 months ago with my last mile split a 7:21!

Checking out a turtle we saw on our run. You can barely see it on the far left of the picture.

I ran a 5k this month and was pleasantly surprised to finish in an average of 7:10 pace which was a 22:15 finishing time. With some of my recent tempo run paces I'm really looking forward to our 5k next weekend to put my training to the test. I hit 7:13 pace for a 5 mile tempo so I'm looking to run an Elise postpartum PR at the race and am thinking a sub-22 may be a possibility. Overall I'm just loving running a lot this month. With harder workouts in my weekly training, my other days I take pretty easy. I talk to Carter as we run and we discuss anything from the life cycle of different animals and how they change as they grow older, to why bag worms aren't caterpillars, to how far we are from the playground. Conversational pace when you have a toddler to chat with is the best!

Carter always wants to get out and run at the end of my runs.

Then there are the days where Elise's schedule is off so I nurse her while pushing the stroller as Carter runs back to the car.

My sweet mom got me a Fitbit Flex when the zip I had stopped working properly. With it I am able to track my sleep and I've really enjoyed looking at my sleep each morning and seeing how much time I actually slept. It always surprises me when I was in bed for 8 hours but got less than 7 hours of sleep or when I was in bed for 7 and a half hours and managed just over 7 hours. I also enjoy seeing how long it took me to fall asleep. I fall to sleep insanely fast. I'm talking under 10 minutes as long as Ty and I don't chat for too long before going to sleep. I think up until this month it would have been slightly depressing to see how little I was sleeping but I'm getting enough sleep now that it is nice to see. It also verified for me that it's nicer for Elise to wake up once at night and then sleep until 7 in the morning rather than sleep for 11 hours and wake at 6 ready for the day. As the night she slept the longest I didn't get as much sleep as other nights. Interesting to say the least. I'm looking forward to another month of faster paces and more sleep!

Life As A Mom of 2

This post has been a work in progress for months. I started it when Elise was a month old and would add a little bit here and there. It was interesting reading back through what I had written before and remembering what the first few months were like as things are so much easier now! I went back through and edited each section so it makes sense with where we are now and then added thoughts to reflect how I feel at nearing 5 months postpartum! Being a mom to 2 has been a lot like how I imagined it would be. Watching Jake a couple days a week helped me understand what I could realistically expect. Even so there have been things that worked out differently than I expected, threw me for a loop, or just didn't even cross my mind. I went into pregnancy fully knowing that the next baby would not be like Carter and expecting a more difficult baby. Luckily for me, Elise is like Carter and she isn't. She's a thumb sucker just like him, she smiles constantly, she's generally happy and easy going. But she's also different. She's easier. She goes down to sleep much easier, she nurses faster, she is more open to other people taking care of her. Carter was a momma's boy through and through. Some say he still is...

My biggest concern with adding to our family was Carter. He was an only child for over 2 years. He was also an only grandchild on both sides and the only niece or nephew to my brothers. The boy was used to a lot of attention. There were times when he would have 6 adoring adults all sitting around watching him. Talk about spoiled! I knew he would have his moments of jealousy, especially in the beginning. I also knew that they'd fade over time and they have. He still has moments where he demands, "Mommy no feed sissy!!!!" because he wants my attention and gosh darn it, didn't you just feed her? How his jealousy has been demonstrated was more of a shocker to me. In the beginning if he saw me holding Elise and was jealous, he might hit the dog, he might hit another kid at the park, or he may just scream. We were at storytime and Carter was having a blast sitting on the carpet and had even made some friends. Elise woke up so I got her out of her car seat and had her sitting on my lap. Carter looked over, saw us and just screeched in the middle of storytime. It was nuts!  This month he has been significantly less jealous, I think due in large part to Elise being able to interact with him more. He loves making her smile and trying to get her to giggle. He adores that she can sit in her Bumbo to watch him do big kid stuff.

Carter was so excited for Elise to watch him make dinner.

Before Elise came along Carter was so independent. He loved going off and playing on his own at the park as well as playing on his own at home. He still is as long as Elise is asleep and I'm not paying attention to her. The minute I have her in my arms or am talking to her, he suddenly needs me. The best remedy to that is including him. If I'm holding Elise because she just woke up I take her over to say hello to him. If I'm trying to get her to roll over I ask Carter to show her how. If I'm playing puppets with her I give him one to play along. She's on my lap? He can sit right beside her. It never fails that when I'm nursing Elise that's when he's desperate to be in my lap, twirling my hair. In the beginning there were times when it was just too much. I had one child pulling on my nipple and the other pulling on my hair. I needed a moment to only be touched by one child. I wasn't even asking to not be touched, I was asking to not be touched by both at the same time! Then there were times I soaked up all the snuggles and loved it. I'm guessing it depended on the amount of sleep I was working with. Little man still has a tendency to show up at my side when I'm tending to Elise. If I'm rocking her to sleep because she's overtired and just not doing the job herself he shows up at my side talking too loudly right as I have her fully asleep. I try not to get frustrated but sometimes I do. I wish the little guy had a whisper voice, but I guess he gets that from me. My mom was always telling me to whisper as a kid and I apparently couldn't do anything quieter than a normal voice.

I rocked Elise to sleep so, of course, Carter walked in talking really loudly and woke her up.

Something that hadn't even crossed my mind was sleep. I knew what I was in for, a baby waking multiple times a night and me being sleep deprived. I was a pro at that. Carter didn't start sleeping through the night until 9 months. I just hadn't thought about how tired I'd be in the morning. When Carter was a newborn we would initially get up around 7 in the morning. We'd play for a little bit and then he'd get tired and we'd go back to sleep for a little morning nap. There were times I was so tired it was hard to wait those 45 minutes to an hour to go back to sleep. That morning nap was my saving grace and I totally forgot about that until Elise came along and I woke up feeling like I'd been run over by a truck. Morning naps would be hella nice but obviously won't ever happen with a toddler in the house. The frustrating part of this situation is that Elise will wake up to eat around 6-6:30. Once I feed her and am back in bed Carter wakes up. There's no rest for the weary around here! Although they both slept until 8am on Monday morning and I felt so refreshed all day. I was like let's go on a walk, let's do yoga, let's play at the park, let's go to the zoo, can we do everything, I feel great!

I figured some things out during the newborn stage that made life much easier. Some things I kick myself and wonder why I didn't think of it with Carter. Each room had a little changing station set up. It was simple, just a container of wipes, a few diapers, and sometimes a pad to lay down but most the time I just used my legs. It was so nice because I could just really quickly change Elise wherever I was and didn't have to leave Carter. I don't do that now because Elise is in cloth diapers and I can't really stash cloth diapers throughout the house, but she also requires fewer diaper changes since she is nursing less and therefore pooing and peeing less. I also set up a diaper changing station in our room when Elise slept in our room. I had a container of wipes and diapers on our window sill above my head so I could just reach up there and grab stuff down to change her diaper in the middle of the night. I also kept extra jammies in our room for middle of the night clothing changes. Not having to get out of bed or leave or room meant I was able to go back to sleep so much quicker.

Carter trying to hold Elise's hand before we headed out for a run.

When I was pregnant I thought a lot about what Carter would do while I nursed Elise. I worried about keeping him busy and looking back it wasn't really something I feel I needed to worry about. But I did do some things that made life easier. I made sure Carter had something he could play with independently, without making a mess, in every room. That way no matter where we are he can keep himself busy while she nurses. He has the magnetic chalkboard and a wagon of Duplo in Elise's room along with all her board books. His room was already packed with toys. He has the train table, cars, and various other toys in the living room. Right by the chair where I nurse Elise in the playroom he has a stash of cars. Even with everything set up for him to play independently there are still times he is desperate to sit on my lap and read books while she nurses and that works too. Lucky for me he always wants to be in the same room as us so I don't have to worry about him running off and making mischief because although I can walk around nursing Elise, it is so much more enjoyable when I don't have to!

At first when both Carter and Elise were crying at the same time it broke my heart. I hated it for both of them. I hated that I felt like I had to choose who I helped first. That has gotten so much easier with time. I've learned to decide who really needs me and who is just crying because 9 times out of 10 that's the case. It's rare for them both to honest to goodness need something at the same time. One time Carter fell and bumped his head while I was nursing Elise. I finished on that side and then picked Carter up and rubbed his back for a little bit before finishing up on the other side with Elise. There have also been times when Carter is crying just because he wants my attention and I let him know he'll need to wait until I'm done feeding Elise and then I'll hold him. Interestingly enough sometimes when I'm done feeding her he no longer needs held! Some mornings Carter is a bit clingier, usually when he wakes up after Ty has left for work so he doesn't get his special daddy/Carter time in the morning. On those mornings he asks me to carry him around so I hold him in one arm and Elise in the other. He thinks it's hilarious!

First attempt at a picture of me holding both babes.

The next attempt turned out a little better.

This time I have been so much more relaxed. I don't plan my outings around Elise's feeding schedule and duck into the restroom if she unexpectedly wants to eat in public. I'm comfortable nursing her whenever and in front of whoever. I use a cover up because it makes me feel more comfortable. We also go out a lot and to wherever we want. I know having Elise in the baby carrier gives us more privacy. No one has tried to touch her when she's in it. Now that it's gotten hotter I don't wear her when we are outside because I don't want her to get too hot. She spends some of the time with me just carrying her because she is strong enough and has good enough neck control that I can carry her on my hip for a little while before moving her over onto my chest. It has been very different having such a young baby during the summer. I bought a fan for her car seat to help out on runs and outdoor outings which has helped tremendously. I wanted to keep Carter's routine as consistent as possible so we kept up with daily outings and playdates. After a couple temper tantrums in public I realized Carter needed more time with just me. So I started making sure our play dates were later in the morning or getting my run in early so I could commit to at least 30 minutes of time either sitting down and reading with Carter or playing with him. It made a world of difference with his mood and made me happy too! Now I don't even attempt to leave the house unless this has happened. He's getting better about sharing time and less jealousy of Elise so we could probably go somewhere without the mommy/Carter time in the morning but it's not worth taking that chance right now!

I've also learned to let go. I got used to vacuuming and mopping twice a week. Every morning I scrubbed the kitchen sink and counters. Laundry was done and folded multiple times a week. I liked being able to clean more as a stay at home mom, especially since Carter had gotten more independent and liked a chunk of time every day for independent play. He loved playing alone with his cars! Now the vacuuming and mopping only happen about once a week or when company is expected, sometimes only every other week. Laundry gets done but not always folded.  When I was writing this post a couple months ago there was a load of clean laundry in the dryer that has been there for probably 4 days. This morning I just folded 2 baskets of laundry that had been sitting around since this weekend. I'm okay with all of that. Because when I'm older and my babies are grown will I ever regret sitting down during Carter's nap time and snuggling Elise to my chest while she slept just because it was the only time I had alone with her? Will I regret that I put down the laundry basket to read a book to Elise since it was the first time her eyes were open all morning and Carter was playing quietly? Will I regret leaving dirty dishes in the sink because Carter asked me to play outside with him? I think not! Would I regret it if it were the other way around? If I had told Carter to wait so I could clean the dishes or I missed reading to Elise because by the time the laundry was folded she was asleep? I know I would!

4 Months Postpartum

Last month running was going so well and I felt so strong. This month has been a bit off. I haven't gotten a long run in at all. I seriously have not run over 6 miles in 4 weeks! So much for getting up to 10-12 miles this month! The first week of the month I was miserable and thought I was sick before I realized I was having terrible issues with allergies. When I thought I was sick I skipped my long run and a couple weekly runs in an attempt to feel better. With the help of my mom I came to the realization I wasn't sick, it was allergies. I got the go-ahead from our pediatrician to take allergy medication while breastfeeding and started to feel better within hours. The next week we were visiting Ty's family and I didn't get a chance to get a long run in. Then the next 2 weeks we had 5k races and I didn't want to overdo it by running a long run the day after a race and a long run on a week day just isn't feasible with Carter in the stroller.

My sweet, little 4 month old!

Although I didn't get a long run in, I did get a speed work out in each week except this past one. I added in a half mile repeat and then a second one later. Now my speed workouts look like this: 0.25-1 mile warm up depending on how much time I have, 3x0.25 at 7:20 pace as a goal (with the stroller it's slower, without it I'm often faster), 2x0.5 at same pace, 3x0.25 at same pace, 0.25-1 mile cool down depending on time. All repeats are run with 1/10 of a mile recovery between. My goal for the quarters is 1:50. I had one work out where I hit 1:38 for one of them which I was pumped about! I did add a tempo run in during the first week. My goal was to run a mile warm up, one mile tempo at 7:30 pace, and a mile cool down. I was pumped when I ran my tempo mile in 7:12 and felt great! The next 2 weeks my 5ks counted as my tempo run as I wanted to have plenty of recovery time between speed work and my races so I didn't want to add in a tempo run as well.

The stroller fan I got has come in so handy this month!

We ran the Firecracker 5k and I felt great about my race, finishing in 23:21 and hitting super consistent miles at 7:30, 7:30, and 7:27! Then I couldn't help but compare my time to my time from after Carter was born and was bummed I had run a 22:50 after Carter. I know I was almost 7 months postpartum then compared to almost 4 months postpartum this time which gives me 3 fewer months of recovery/training, but I still wished I'd run a bit faster. I went into my next race hoping to better my time and despite a terrible race where I consistently slowed down each mile, I ran a 22:35. I should have been pleased with my time but the way I ran the race left me unimpressed. My legs felt terrible after about the half way point and I gave up, letting my pace falter.

Taking off at the start of the Midsummer's Night 5k.

The entire week after that second race my legs felt trashed and I struggled to hit paces without the stroller that I can normally run with it. I would compare how my legs felt and how my recovery went to post half-marathon. My legs actually felt worse and it was taking me longer to recover than it typically does for a half. I got up early to run while Ty got ready for work so I could run without the stroller and hopefully recover quicker. I also wanted more time at home with Carter in the mornings to work on potty training rather than taking him on a run with no access to a potty. I also kept adding another easy recovery run in hopes my legs would shake out and feel better the next day. Each day I was bummed when I got out there and felt terrible again. I ended up skipping my speed workout, tempo run, and long run for the week in hopes the next week I could start fresh with recovered legs. I didn't want to run those hard workouts on worn out legs and worsen my issues.

Sweetest running buddies you'll ever see!

That last week of this month was so disappointing and got me down. I was bummed about my training going downhill and missing out on all of my hard workouts for the week. I hated running so slow and coming home from a run exhausted. It was really hard for me mentally. I think the problem was that running 5ks back to back weekends was too much for my body right now. I didn't think anything of it when we signed up because it was the type of thing I would have done with no problems before, but I forget that I just had a baby a few months ago and don't give myself enough of a break. I mean, I've only been running consistently with no walk breaks for about 2.5 months. When I think of it like that it helps me put things in perspective. Now I have a better understanding of what my body can handle right now and back to back races isn't something I'll do again for a while. Maybe I could've done it had I not run speed work 4 days after the first 5k/3 days before the second race which gave me shorter recovery after the race and left my legs tired going into the next one. Whatever the case I am optimistic that my training will get back on track this week and I'll have a better month since I'm just running one race. I need a bit of a confidence builder after this past week!

Carter loves to take care of his sister while we run!

I stopped having continuous bleeding at 9 weeks postpartum. Since then I would randomly bleed about 1-2 days a week, some weeks not at all. I finally called my doctor's office because I was starting to worry something might be wrong with me. They had me come in for an ultrasound and blood work. The ultrasound looked good and showed the lining of my uterus was super thin with no placenta materials left behind. The blood work also came back normal. The doctor wasn't concerned and said my options were to just deal with the bleeding, have a D&C, or stop breastfeeding and go on a birth control with estrogen to stop the bleeding. The obvious choice for me was to just deal with the bleeding. I know every pregnancy, labor and delivery, and recovery is different but I can't help but think I jumped back into running too quickly and too strenuously after Elise's birth and am now paying the price. Although that could be completely unrelated, who knows! Hopefully I'll have something better to report next month!

No matter what, she's so worth it!