Funny Stuff

"Why can't we just be born not stupid?" -Elise (because she didn't want to go to school)

Elise: Did you eat watercress when you were in China?

Me: I've never been to China. I've been to Thailand and India.

Elise: Weren't you born in China?

Me: No, I was born in Ohio.

Elise: Oh, that's what I was thinking of, Ohio! Is that in China?

Carter asks me to Google things by saying, "Can you search it up?"

"Do you think once we go to Heaven we can see Santa?" -Elise

Ty: Mahomes has played in 15 playoff games and 2 Super Bowls, but never away games. He's always played at home.

Elise: Wait, they can play at their house?

Elise to Ty: Does it feel weird for you pants to be hangin down?

Elise: He is udderly confused!

Also Elise: I do not give you milk!

Elise asked how to dislike Libby because it didn't have a book she wanted.

"Don't ask mommy questions when she's vibing to music." -Carter

I was watching a video where a kid said someone lived with a demon. Carter overheard it and said, "I wonder why he lives with a demon?"

Me: Do you want me to sign you back up for chess club?

Carter: No, chess club was the worst hour of my life.

*Silence*

Carter: Actually, the worst hours of my life were waiting in line to get my Narwhal and Jelly book signed.

I read Elise a sign about how long trees have been alive. She said, "So the trees were walking around?!"